May 11, 2008
May 10, 2008
3 miles is far...
Things I learned today:
1. 3 miles is a lot further than I thought. Perhaps it was the hilly ups and downs, most of which were made pushing a 26 pound toddler in a stroller. Perhaps it was that the first .5 miles was spent going 'toddler pace' ie stop and backtrack then go again then stop and play with a rock every five minutes.
2. Why I think it is so hilarious when Sam picks up food off the freshly vacuumed floor of my living room and someone tries to stop him - today I saw Sam try to eat several sticks, multiple rocks, a couple pinecones, and a handful of dirt and pine needles.
3. At two, Sam can still fall asleep in a stoller travelling up hills and down, over rocks and roots, and still be asleep.
4. Seeing a deer 5 feet away eating leaves off a tree branch, and Sam being completely quiet and pointing in wonder makes the whole world fade away into happiness.
1. 3 miles is a lot further than I thought. Perhaps it was the hilly ups and downs, most of which were made pushing a 26 pound toddler in a stroller. Perhaps it was that the first .5 miles was spent going 'toddler pace' ie stop and backtrack then go again then stop and play with a rock every five minutes.
2. Why I think it is so hilarious when Sam picks up food off the freshly vacuumed floor of my living room and someone tries to stop him - today I saw Sam try to eat several sticks, multiple rocks, a couple pinecones, and a handful of dirt and pine needles.
3. At two, Sam can still fall asleep in a stoller travelling up hills and down, over rocks and roots, and still be asleep.
4. Seeing a deer 5 feet away eating leaves off a tree branch, and Sam being completely quiet and pointing in wonder makes the whole world fade away into happiness.
Mother's Day
On my first Mother's Day, Sam was less than 2 weeks old, and I was still in that exhausted new-mom place. It's hard to believe it's been two years, that I've been a mother for two years. In some ways it feels like forever, and in other ways it feels like it's flown by. I feel like I was always meant to be a mother. I love it, I love my boy and the time I've spent with him. This Mother's Day I'm escited to be watching Sam grow and learn. Today he and I went for a walk in the woods and we saw a deer. Sam had just woken up from napping in his stroller for about half an hour, and I bent down to whisper to him and point at the deer. He saw it. We looked at the deer, a mere 5 feet away chewing leaves off a branch near the path. Sam didn't make a sound. He just reached out his little hand and pointed. The deer moved, his hand relaxed, then pointed again. And in that moment, I was not thinking about how he hasn't been eating the past few days or how he's not talking yet. I also was not thinking about how I was on a 3 mile trail that I didn't know how far I was, or the hills I had in front of me to push the stroller up. It was a perfect moment, and I think it was my Mother's Day present from... somewhere.
May 8, 2008
So many....
There are so many movies I'm looking forward to this year, and I didn't even know this one was coming out! Thanks Miss Zoot!
The Swell Season, Iron Man, and Random TV Thoughts
The Swell Season: I went to an amazing concert last Wednesday and never got a chance to write about it. My friend Violet and I went to see The Swell Season at the Moore Theater in Seattle. We decided not to go for the opening act since Violet was leaving her 5 month old daughter at home for one of the only times ever. We somehow managed to arrive at the top of the five flights of stairs (not exaggerating) we had to climb to get to our seats RIGHT as Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova took the stage. Excellent. Despite the fact that we were about 3000 feet above the stage at the very top of the theater, it's not that big a venue and we could see okay. The only unfortunate thing was that there was a speaker hanging down so we couldn't see the person playing the piano (Marketa for the majority of the concert). They did a bunch of songs from 'Once' and others I hadn't heard. I always love it when musicians give stories behind their songs, and there was much of that, my favorite being a crazy story about a song inspired by two souls who had been burned at the stake for being retarded in the 1400s and wandered about in the dark until recently. 'Once' was my favorite movie of the year last year, and if you haven't seen it yet, you should go out and rent it right now. If you're not a movie fan, buy the soundtrack, you won't be disappointed.
Iron Man: AWESOME! I went and saw Ironman on Sunday with Violet and my cousin. It was SO GOOD. I loved it. I am a huge fan of comic book movies, and will even go so far as to see them even if I don't think they're going to be that good (coughghostridercough) just to support the genre. Then every once in a while one comes along that is so good it validates my supporting it. The last one I liked to this degree was 300, which I didn't even expect to like that much. And yes, I realize that is a graphic novel and I know the difference, but it's still the same genre in many ways. Robert Downey Jr. was so good as Tony Stark. Maybe it's because that's partly how he really is, I don't know. But he did a great job, and the graphics and everything were amazing. Also, Jeff Bridges is REALLY creepy with no hair. What's up with that? It was so good I want to see it again.
ER: Why was last week's episode of ER actually pretty good? I can't stop watching it even though it's been on the air for 57 years and the plots repeat. I just can't give up now, it's like when you're in a line and at some point you cross that threshold where you kind of want to give up and go home, but you've already invested so much time in the line you can't bear the thought of giving up your spot. I can't stop watching ER. I actually have really enjoyed the progression of the Morris character. I remember HATING him when he first arrived, which I guess you were supposed to, but now I just feel like I want to be his friend...
Grey's Anatomy: I thought last week's episode was really good, and it brought the tears (when DOESN'T it, really). There is always some random scene that affects me, and this time it was Miranda and Addisons conversation in the scrub room. I like Private Practice okay, but I think I'd be happier if Addison was just back on Grey's.
Battlestar Galactica: I haven't watched last week's episode yet because we had company in town. But I have REALLY been enjoying this season, and I'm fascinated by the whole Cylons vs. Cylons thing that is going on right now. I read today that Esai Morales, who recently starred in the second season of Jericho, will take the role of Joseph Adama on the new series Caprica. Interesting....
American Idol: All I want to say is that people made the right choice this week. Blech on you Jason. I hope Syesha wins.
Top Chef: I don't like Dale, and I hope he doesn't win. I do love Richard. He is awesome, and I thought he was so cute in the wedding episode, all happy to be at the wedding. He just seems like a nice guy, and that he knows what he's doing. I'm rooting for him.
ANTM: Goodbye Dominique! Thank goodness... As a heavy girl, I am of course rooting for Whitney. She's just so sassy and cute!
Okay, that's all for now. I'm tired and my eyeballs are about to fall out.
Iron Man: AWESOME! I went and saw Ironman on Sunday with Violet and my cousin. It was SO GOOD. I loved it. I am a huge fan of comic book movies, and will even go so far as to see them even if I don't think they're going to be that good (coughghostridercough) just to support the genre. Then every once in a while one comes along that is so good it validates my supporting it. The last one I liked to this degree was 300, which I didn't even expect to like that much. And yes, I realize that is a graphic novel and I know the difference, but it's still the same genre in many ways. Robert Downey Jr. was so good as Tony Stark. Maybe it's because that's partly how he really is, I don't know. But he did a great job, and the graphics and everything were amazing. Also, Jeff Bridges is REALLY creepy with no hair. What's up with that? It was so good I want to see it again.
ER: Why was last week's episode of ER actually pretty good? I can't stop watching it even though it's been on the air for 57 years and the plots repeat. I just can't give up now, it's like when you're in a line and at some point you cross that threshold where you kind of want to give up and go home, but you've already invested so much time in the line you can't bear the thought of giving up your spot. I can't stop watching ER. I actually have really enjoyed the progression of the Morris character. I remember HATING him when he first arrived, which I guess you were supposed to, but now I just feel like I want to be his friend...
Grey's Anatomy: I thought last week's episode was really good, and it brought the tears (when DOESN'T it, really). There is always some random scene that affects me, and this time it was Miranda and Addisons conversation in the scrub room. I like Private Practice okay, but I think I'd be happier if Addison was just back on Grey's.
Battlestar Galactica: I haven't watched last week's episode yet because we had company in town. But I have REALLY been enjoying this season, and I'm fascinated by the whole Cylons vs. Cylons thing that is going on right now. I read today that Esai Morales, who recently starred in the second season of Jericho, will take the role of Joseph Adama on the new series Caprica. Interesting....
American Idol: All I want to say is that people made the right choice this week. Blech on you Jason. I hope Syesha wins.
Top Chef: I don't like Dale, and I hope he doesn't win. I do love Richard. He is awesome, and I thought he was so cute in the wedding episode, all happy to be at the wedding. He just seems like a nice guy, and that he knows what he's doing. I'm rooting for him.
ANTM: Goodbye Dominique! Thank goodness... As a heavy girl, I am of course rooting for Whitney. She's just so sassy and cute!
Okay, that's all for now. I'm tired and my eyeballs are about to fall out.
May 4, 2008
It's funny because it's true
Check out this article over at College Humor that Justin found the other day. The Gilette 5 blade is my favorite... Seven Jokes that Came True
May 2, 2008
TWO
Dear Sam,
Two years ago at this very moment I lay in the dark in an uncomfortable hospital bed with my brand new 8 hour old baby in the bassinet next to me. We didn't get much sleep that first night. I know now that even 8 hour old babies get hungry, and unfortunately I wasn't able to give you what you needed, although I wouldn't realize it until a couple of days later. You were perfect. Your hair was so blonde it was almost white, it reflected the light like silver. Your eyes were so dark that I couldn't really tell they were blue, although I knew they were. You were my world, wrapped up in a blanket like a burrito, and I finally knew what love at first sight felt like.
It's hard to believe that two whole years have passed since you were that tiny baby. You were so small that every single item of clothing was too big, that you could sleep on my chest with your feet ending barely past my belly button. You couldn't move, couldn't hold up your head, couldn't smile or play. I spent so much of my time then just looking at you, watching you awake and asleep and loving you. My first child, a son, named for an ancestor and a friend, the love of our lives in a warm, sweet smelling bundle.
When you were a baby, you hated taking baths. Now, you would stay in the bath for hours, splashing and playing until your fingers and toes turned into prunes and the water was ice cold. You love water, and I can't wait to take you to the beach this summer and watch you play in the waves. You are all little boy - I look at you now with your new haircut and your chin that's lost all it's baby fat, and your mouth full of little boy teeth, and wonder where the last two years have gone. You love cars and trains. You impress me every day. Where did you learn how to make elephant noises, how to say 'choo choo' and pull with your arm like you're pulling a whistle chain, to do the hand movements to 'Itsy Bitsy Spider'? How do these things happen so fast when I'm not looking?
Your favorite book is 'Go, Dog, Go' and I have passed another mommy milestone in having the entire book memorized. I could recite it to you no matter where we are if it will make you happy. You like books, and I'm glad for that. You point at the pictures and listen to the words I say. I think you're storing them all up. You don't really talk yet, although you've started saying 'drop' again lately and we've heard you slip up and let your words out a couple of times. I think that one day you're just going to start spouting sentences and surprise us all. I have my moments, the mommy fear kicks in. Sometimes when you're frustrated or upset you hit yourself in the head with your tiny fists. I try to tell myself it's normal, that it's just frustration about not being able to communicate, but baby, part of being a mommy is worrying about your little boy. I'll be happy when this time passes and I can look back and laugh at myself for worrying.
You are smart. You know your shapes, and can point out all of the characters from "Blue's Clues" and "Dora the Explorer". I know you watch too much, TV, but you do love "Bee Movie". The other night we went out for dinner and you ate your entire meal on the bench next to Justin because no high chairs were available. The entire meal. I couldn't believe how good you were, how it didn't seem to matter that you weren't in a high chair. You love slides, and you climb to the highest one every time, unafraid to sit down and push off and fly down the lenth of it. You will do it over and over. You like to swing, and are good at letting me know when you're ready to get down and start sliding again.
I love it that you are a cuddler. You understand when Daddy or I get hurt, and you give us kisses to make us feel better. Sometimes you kiss us for no reason at all. I love the way you cuddle up next to me in the early morning or right before bedtime, laying with your head next to mine, and pull my arm around you to hold you near. I can never have enough hugs from you.
We play in the back yard, and have been discovering all of the best playgrounds for toddlers around Bellingham. Tomorrow some of our closest friends and family will come to one of those parks to help us celebrate your second birthday. You are loved, little man, you are loved so much that I can't even believe it. Your Aunt Kira comes over to watch you every Monday, and when she leaves, you cry. I am always sad to see you cry, but it fills my heart with joy that you love her and know you're loved by her, and that you miss her when she leaves. Your Grandma Edie comes over on Tuesday and Thursdays, and you do the same. I love to watch you interact with your family. I am so excited for you to grow up surrounded by these people, in this wonderful place.
Your Grandma Helene and Aunt Lianna are here visiting, I'm happy they'll be here for your party, and you have been having a blast with them around. I wish we could see them more often, but I will make sure that you always get to see them and talk to them, even when the visits are a little further between.
Sam, you are amazing. The love I feel for you fills my heart, wells out my eyes, and runs down my cheeks. Sometimes I am overwhelmed just holding you in my lap with my arms around you, breathing into your hair and feeling the warmth of your skin. Two. I can't wait for the next one, and the next one... I want to hold you here with me forever, but also can't wait to see what you're going to do next.
Happy Birthday my not so baby little boy. I love you.
Mama
Two years ago at this very moment I lay in the dark in an uncomfortable hospital bed with my brand new 8 hour old baby in the bassinet next to me. We didn't get much sleep that first night. I know now that even 8 hour old babies get hungry, and unfortunately I wasn't able to give you what you needed, although I wouldn't realize it until a couple of days later. You were perfect. Your hair was so blonde it was almost white, it reflected the light like silver. Your eyes were so dark that I couldn't really tell they were blue, although I knew they were. You were my world, wrapped up in a blanket like a burrito, and I finally knew what love at first sight felt like.
It's hard to believe that two whole years have passed since you were that tiny baby. You were so small that every single item of clothing was too big, that you could sleep on my chest with your feet ending barely past my belly button. You couldn't move, couldn't hold up your head, couldn't smile or play. I spent so much of my time then just looking at you, watching you awake and asleep and loving you. My first child, a son, named for an ancestor and a friend, the love of our lives in a warm, sweet smelling bundle.
When you were a baby, you hated taking baths. Now, you would stay in the bath for hours, splashing and playing until your fingers and toes turned into prunes and the water was ice cold. You love water, and I can't wait to take you to the beach this summer and watch you play in the waves. You are all little boy - I look at you now with your new haircut and your chin that's lost all it's baby fat, and your mouth full of little boy teeth, and wonder where the last two years have gone. You love cars and trains. You impress me every day. Where did you learn how to make elephant noises, how to say 'choo choo' and pull with your arm like you're pulling a whistle chain, to do the hand movements to 'Itsy Bitsy Spider'? How do these things happen so fast when I'm not looking?
Your favorite book is 'Go, Dog, Go' and I have passed another mommy milestone in having the entire book memorized. I could recite it to you no matter where we are if it will make you happy. You like books, and I'm glad for that. You point at the pictures and listen to the words I say. I think you're storing them all up. You don't really talk yet, although you've started saying 'drop' again lately and we've heard you slip up and let your words out a couple of times. I think that one day you're just going to start spouting sentences and surprise us all. I have my moments, the mommy fear kicks in. Sometimes when you're frustrated or upset you hit yourself in the head with your tiny fists. I try to tell myself it's normal, that it's just frustration about not being able to communicate, but baby, part of being a mommy is worrying about your little boy. I'll be happy when this time passes and I can look back and laugh at myself for worrying.
You are smart. You know your shapes, and can point out all of the characters from "Blue's Clues" and "Dora the Explorer". I know you watch too much, TV, but you do love "Bee Movie". The other night we went out for dinner and you ate your entire meal on the bench next to Justin because no high chairs were available. The entire meal. I couldn't believe how good you were, how it didn't seem to matter that you weren't in a high chair. You love slides, and you climb to the highest one every time, unafraid to sit down and push off and fly down the lenth of it. You will do it over and over. You like to swing, and are good at letting me know when you're ready to get down and start sliding again.
I love it that you are a cuddler. You understand when Daddy or I get hurt, and you give us kisses to make us feel better. Sometimes you kiss us for no reason at all. I love the way you cuddle up next to me in the early morning or right before bedtime, laying with your head next to mine, and pull my arm around you to hold you near. I can never have enough hugs from you.
We play in the back yard, and have been discovering all of the best playgrounds for toddlers around Bellingham. Tomorrow some of our closest friends and family will come to one of those parks to help us celebrate your second birthday. You are loved, little man, you are loved so much that I can't even believe it. Your Aunt Kira comes over to watch you every Monday, and when she leaves, you cry. I am always sad to see you cry, but it fills my heart with joy that you love her and know you're loved by her, and that you miss her when she leaves. Your Grandma Edie comes over on Tuesday and Thursdays, and you do the same. I love to watch you interact with your family. I am so excited for you to grow up surrounded by these people, in this wonderful place.
Your Grandma Helene and Aunt Lianna are here visiting, I'm happy they'll be here for your party, and you have been having a blast with them around. I wish we could see them more often, but I will make sure that you always get to see them and talk to them, even when the visits are a little further between.
Sam, you are amazing. The love I feel for you fills my heart, wells out my eyes, and runs down my cheeks. Sometimes I am overwhelmed just holding you in my lap with my arms around you, breathing into your hair and feeling the warmth of your skin. Two. I can't wait for the next one, and the next one... I want to hold you here with me forever, but also can't wait to see what you're going to do next.
Happy Birthday my not so baby little boy. I love you.
Mama
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